I have lost 9 pets. Each one of them was my world. I don’t have babies. I have four legged babies who give me unconditional love. They are funny and all kinda derpy but that’s what we love about them.

We lost Wilbur Tuesday night. He was the best guinea pig. He loved to be held and snuggle. He always nibbled on the tip of my nose and gave me little tiny kisses. He loved the cat’s food and drinking out of their water bowl. When he came out he would make a bee line to the kitchen. I’d put hay down and he would click click on the wood floor running between cat stuff and hay. He was brave. He would run up to the cats to try and sniff them and they, being excellent hunters, would run so fast when they saw him. He was so picky. One day he would love carrots, the next day I’d have to go to the damn store to get him something different. He was the same way with his lettuce.

I would happily have an extra cage to clean. I’d run to the store ten times a day to get Wilbs a new snack to try. I’d buy all the different guinea pig treats and toys at Petco so he would ignore them.

The pain we are feeling with Wilbur is different. It’s harder to try and be happy during a bad time and we all know how hard it is to try and be happy sometimes. I keep getting these moments of deep sadness. Josh does too. The tears keep happening.

We decided to cremate him. We could have him with us forever. Josh found a place in Southbury. I brought him on Weds and he is home now. He is on the mantle with his penguin stuffy who was his best friend. There will be a picture of him there soon. We want to have him with us. I look at him often. I’m so grateful Josh thought of this.

A note to Wilbur…

Oh Wilbs. We miss you buddy. We are so lucky that you waited to say goodbye to us. Thank you for letting us love you. Thank you for loving us back. Moo says he is sorry for being a rapey dickhead. Ham has been quiet. Gizmo lays next to your cage. Clover won’t leave my side. We can’t seem to move your home. I was not ready to say goodbye Your dad wasn’t either. We know you are hanging out with Rex, Frodo, Doby and Samwise. They are showing you the ropes. You have all your favorite lettuce and apples and carrots and grapes. You are back home with us. We will see you at the end of the rainbow bridge. We love you.


I am sharing my story of why and how I developed BPD and what I am doing to rebuild myself.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s